Being Alone (Why you can't stand it)

A situation many people have and continue to face is being alone. This has increased exponentially in the last few months due to Covid-19 and I am sure many of you can relate. I'd like to begin by posing a question: why is it we can feel so alone in a world full of people? This is similar to the question of why people feel alone in crowds. The beauty of being alone is that you are supposed to take time and get to know yourself. A person who is constantly distracted from the beginning of their life to the end of it will not be able to answer the question "who are you?" Everyone wants to be alone at some point, people can be frustrating. Roommates, family, and lovers, everyone can become a nuisance at one point. There exists a fine line between people who enjoy being alone and people who hate being alone. But what if you were forced to be alone? Does this change anything? Does this tap into our human emotion of never wanting to be restrained? Think of a child told to clean his room, most of the time, they don't want to do it at that particular moment, they see it as a chore and they may do it angrily because you are forcing them. But on the other hand, a child who sees their room is messy and realizes it's embarrassing or inconvenient will choose to clean it up and they won't do it in an angry manner because it is their choice. This is also the case when a child is told to do something but rather than do it immediately, they are given a deadline to do it by. (It is actually a parenting hack, make the child feel like they are in control, like it is their choice) Does this same concept apply to being forced to be alone? Covid-19 has tested this concept. Families are separated or in some cases (worse) forced to be together. This quarantine has forced us to be apart from loved ones and friends. How have people been handling it? I'm sure people who enjoy being alone have a breaking point. When a busy person says they wish they had time to be alone, they never necessarily know how long it is they can go without human contact. It is simply a hypothesis or a nice thought. But when the time comes, how long can you survive? Let's look at an example, perhaps an older gentleman lives alone because his wife passed and his family is in another state. He is forcibly isolated with the only form of contact being his devices such as his tablet and phone. His family tries to communicate with him as much as they can, but they can't be in constant communication every minute of every day. This is the harsh reality we are facing at the moment. 

Time alone can be destructive for people. Being alone with my thoughts (personally) is a deadly thing. Humans are prone to overthink. This overthinking can drive a person mad simply because they have time to analyze and re-analyze a situation. They may begin to question things that happened or think that people don't care for them as much as they really do. This may explain the idea that a person who is incarcerated in maximum security for a period of time can go insane. Boredom is also a factor that comes into play when time alone is forced. We are only so creative and with nothing to do, our creativity begins to vanish and we start to become bored. We lose our sense of purpose and in severe cases question our purpose. It is a domino effect because a human without a purpose will have no drive or motivation. A final thought comes from the feeling of being cared for. A person who is alone and has no one to rely on or has little contact with the outside world will begin to feel isolated like no one cares about them. Perhaps, they wake up every morning to no new notifications on their phone. Unfortunately, modern technology has made us dependent on our devices and everyone should understand the conflict of Instagram and Likes. Similarly, it is a painful thought, no one cares about me. Depending on the person and the amount of time, we all have a breaking point, and this can lead to severe consequences.  

Check up on your friends and family as much as you can.

Especially during these harsh times...

Expressed by: Oscar Mendieta